As a result of their attachment issues, they will do whatever they please and then come back to you confused and bewildered. Instead of offering an explanation, they choose to avoid taking responsibility for their behavior. They hope you will welcome them back with open arms and assure them everything will be fine, despite the fact that they’ve brought nothing but trouble, drama, and tragedy to your life.
However, in practice, this is not how things function. They can’t simply return with a weak explanation or nothing at all and assume everything will be great. The harm they caused remains, and it’s not as simple as welcoming them back. Some people we know have trouble picking up on social cues; they have either never learned to read or simply do not care to read the emotional clues of others. This trait may have its roots in a traumatic upbringing.
Because of their difficulty reading non-verbal cues, these individuals often receive special care and treatment. Narcissists have a hard time accepting defeat and will do everything it takes to hold on to you once they find out you’ve had enough. If they think you’re worth engaging with again, they will. This will begin the cycle of appreciation, depreciation, and eventual abandonment all over again. Yet, if you’ve broken out of this pattern, the narcissist won’t try to reconnect with you. Instead, they will keep tabs on you, either directly or indirectly through “flying monkeys,” because in their minds, you still belong to them, even if you no longer physically do.
After a breakup, the tracking and surveillance might continue for weeks, months, or even years. This is due to the narcissist’s fixation on you and their need to keep tabs on you. “How are you doing?” they might inquire. They would be overjoyed if you were stuck in your misery or anxiety and unable to move on, but that’s how they naturally act and think.
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