But when did it become normal to shame others, to make them feel powerless, to laugh at their flaws, or to weaponize their innocence and love? It’s not normal. Here’s my personal experience: For almost 10 to 15 years, my father would talk about what happened at his office every single night at dinner. It wasn’t just general sharing; in every story, he was the hero. He would tell us how he outmaneuvered someone, shamed them, or pointed out their flaws. And I still remember that smile on his face, that demonic laughter. I hate the sound of it. He would expect us to maintain eye contact and nod in agreement, asking open questions like, “How did you feel afterward? That must have been a great experience for you.”
As a child, I remember thinking, “How stupid is this man, telling these stories to his vulnerable children who have no choice but to agree?” In reality, he was a weakling, a coward. He would stammer when talking to strangers. I’m not shaming those who struggle with stammering—it could be a trauma response—but the contrast between what he so passionately talked about and what he actually did in reality was stark. Those stories were part of his fantasy to overcome the shame he continuously struggled with.
Have you experienced something like this with the narcissist who abused you?
How to Make a Narcissist Panic
Sharing is caring!
