When the narcissistic collapse happens — call it deflation, a fall from grace, or a mask drop — it’s usually cumulative. Several things in the narcissist’s life start going wrong. The suit of entitlement they’ve worn starts getting dented, little holes appearing here and there. Their usual tricks don’t work anymore. Sometimes this happens as they age, losing the power, money, or attractiveness they once relied on. Sometimes, the consequences of their bad behavior finally catch up to them. After years of burning people, someone finally stands up to them. Or perhaps societal changes create real consequences for behavior they once got away with.
When the narcissist’s armor falls apart, they can’t turn their charm on and off as easily. The most common fallout of their collapse is rage. You may have endured their rage privately for years, triggered by minor frustrations. Perhaps they laughed off a joke at a party, only to unleash their anger on you afterward. But when things start going wrong in their life, they let their rage loose publicly. This shame-rage spiral plays out for everyone to see.
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