So they will punish you. How? By keeping you out there. The door is always closed for you. And that is what this narcissist does not want to happen to them. They want to be included at all costs, even if that means betraying their own family, the family they have with you, their own children. Not attending to your needs, your desires, and letting them abuse you. As I said earlier, it’s not only the narcissist who abuses; it’s the flying monkeys, it’s this family, their siblings, their cousins, their parents. Everybody collectively plays a role in bringing you down, and the narcissist acts like a bystander who is a hypocrite. Basically, he knows, she knows what’s going on, but they act like a fool, or they give you false hope and say, “Oh, I’ll take care of it. Don’t worry. I’ll talk to them.” But in reality, nothing is happening behind your back. They are saying horrible things about you to further alienate you from this cult.
5. The narcissist’s loyalty lies not with the family itself
The narcissist’s loyalty lies not with the family itself; it lies with the image gratification that happens via the association with the family. You need to understand, it’s one unit, and one person’s image is everybody’s image. And it’s the responsibility of each person to maintain the collective image. They are known as this kind, caring, compassionate, amazing family, a warm family who invites everybody in. If that is the image, then everybody has to play a role in maintaining that, no matter how fake it is, no matter how nasty they are within the four walls. So, to be seen as a part of this great family, they stay a part of it, no matter how rotten the dynamics, no matter how it is impacting them, their life, or their partner.
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