Now we’re entering a whole new level: the flying monkeys come into play. This is when the narcissist starts deploying their arsenal of manipulative tactics. “Nobody will ever love you the way I do,” they’ll say, or “You’ll never find anyone else. If you leave, I’ll destroy you.” It might be subtle; it might be blunt, but the message is clear: they will do whatever it takes to keep you in their grasp. “I’ll go to your workplace and expose who you really are,” or “I’ll call your family and tell them everything.” They know exactly which buttons to push, and they’ll do it with precision.
Some people, unfortunately, fall into the trap and get blackmailed into staying. But here’s the harsh reality: this is the next stage of abuse. If someone is blackmailing you to stay in a relationship, there are no excuses. No matter what they threaten or how much they manipulate, you need to walk away. This is not love; it’s control. Get out, and get out now.
Another classic tactic: “I’m going to tell everyone you’re abusive. You’ll never see your kids again.” This is when their desperation peaks. They know the game is up and that they can no longer keep you under their spell. When that veil is lifted, they spiral. They start lashing out, using whatever they can to make you doubt yourself. They know they’ve pushed you to the brink, and the love bombing phase might start again. Maybe they’ll breadcrumb you—little gestures to keep you emotionally tethered. It’s like a roller coaster they can’t stop riding. One minute they’re rage-filled, and the next they’re trying to reel you back in with affection. It’s exhausting, manipulative, and confusing.
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