Narcissists smell insecurity like sharks smell blood.
If your energy says:
- “I need your approval,”
- “I’m scared of losing you,”
- “I need you to like me,”
…you become their playground.
But if your energy is calm, grounded, full, and self-respecting, the entire game changes. A narcissist respects what they can’t easily manipulate. The more self-contained you are, the less appealing you become as a target.
Your strongest shield is your emotional independence.
2. Hold Your Cards Close to Your Chest
If a narcissist senses that you understand their tactics, you become a threat.
So keep your observations private.
Smile. Nod. Observe.
Don’t announce, “I know what you’re doing” unless you want retaliation.
This is temporary and strategic—not a long-term way of living—but it keeps you safer while you plan your exit or establish new boundaries.
3. Become Bulletproof
When you have unresolved trauma, the narcissist’s comments feel like knives.
But once you heal, something powerful happens:
Their insults lose meaning.
Their blame slides off.
Their manipulation fails to stick.
Practice the gray rock method—be boring, non-reactive, unbothered.
Narcissists lose interest in people whose emotional buttons they can’t push.
4. Present With a Superior Image or Status
This isn’t about becoming arrogant.
This is about leveraging a narcissist’s own psychology.
Narcissists:
- respect status,
- respect confidence,
- respect people others admire,
- and deeply crave association with anything “elite.”
If you carry yourself with self-respect—calm, poised, slightly aloof—they respond to it. Even their envy won’t stop them from treating you more carefully.
You become someone they don’t want to be publicly at odds with.
5. Develop Self-Agency
Self-agency means:
- you make your own choices,
- you think for yourself,
- you don’t let anyone steer your life for you.
Narcissists hate people who can’t be controlled…
…and they respect them, quietly and resentfully.
When you stop enabling them, stop making excuses for them, stop bending your life around their moods, the dynamic shifts. You’re no longer an easy target.
6. Be Boundaried—Seriously
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