There are many topics that arouse varying opinions, from politics to entertainment. Narcissists may have opinions about everything but don’t want to hear yours. In their mind, there’s only one opinion that matters, and it’s theirs.
3. In what ways do you need to grow and change?
When you get to know someone, asking this question can reveal sincerity. However, narcissists think, “I don’t need to grow and change.” Admitting the need for growth implies they aren’t complete, which illustrates their hidden shame.
2. If I make you feel so frustrated, why do you keep coming back?
Even if a narcissist expresses anger and frustration toward you, they often keep returning because it makes them feel superior. Every time they criticize you, they feel validated, as if they need to keep you around to feel better about themselves.
1. Why do you go silent?
Sometimes, narcissists will give you the silent treatment or withdraw. This behavior illustrates their fear and tendency toward passive-aggressive anger. They get their anger out with the least amount of vulnerability.
These are questions a narcissist simply can’t answer; they cannot access their interior selves.
I hope that as you observe these dynamics, you’ll develop an entirely different mindset. For example, I hope you can think, “I like being personable, and I like being accountable. I want to continue learning and growing.” Freedom means you don’t have to hide behind pretenses.
Another thought is “Love me, love my dog.” This old Southern saying suggests that when you get me, you also get what comes with me.
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