As I mentioned, their resources would eventually run out. Perhaps you got sick, lost your job, went bankrupt, or had surgery. That’s when the narcissist typically discarded you and moved on to another source that had been waiting in the wings almost your whole life, as long as you’ve known them. After all of this, the narcissist didn’t think you would piece yourself back together.
Please watch this crucial part of the video again and again because the narcissist knew exactly what they were doing to you. They were aware of the abuse they inflicted on you and continued to do so daily, weekly, monthly, or even over years or decades. They knew something would eventually give, and they would dump you, or you would decide to leave.
Your third option was to remain stuck in that zombie-like narcissistic fog. If you were there, comment below. Your existence there means you were an extension of the narcissist because you were dead and drained day by day. The narcissist didn’t expect you to heal, to practice radical acceptance, and to realize that you are abundant, beautiful, and bright—far brighter than the narcissist.
The narcissist tricked, trapped, and manipulated you into thinking you needed them. This was the trauma bond. You were always off balance, never knowing who you were speaking to when you called, texted, or emailed the narcissist. You never had stability. This was not the life you signed up for. The narcissist intentionally threw you off balance so you would become trapped in their trauma bond.
The trauma bond is something you weren’t prepared for, and leaving it is one of the hardest things you will ever do because you weren’t taught about narcissism in school. The trauma bond surprised you—you struggled to understand why everything was going wrong, and you found yourself like a shell of your former self. You were being consumed by the narcissist, so everything turned awry day and night. You would think about them constantly, respond to texts, explain what you were doing, what you were going to do, and what you planned to do. The narcissist would read the text and respond with “okay” or “great,” or sometimes, they wouldn’t respond at all. Did that happen to you?
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