This article focuses on the number one thing they never anticipated you would do. Let’s revisit your time with the narcissist before I reveal that. What kind of relationship was it, and how did it affect you? How have you changed forever since you entered that relationship with a toxic narcissist, unaware of the concept of narcissism due to a lack of education and awareness? You thought you were merely chalking up the relationship to a series of bad days and dismissed it as the actions of someone with issues playing the victim or mistreating you, but you couldn’t fully understand it.
You kept working for the narcissist and maintained the relationship. As I’ve mentioned on the channel, your time, money, energy, effort, love, empathy, social standing, social circle, finances, and health were all depleting. This happened because you gave too much; you supported an unproductive relationship. The narcissist was trying to puncture holes in your boat so it would capsize as you paddled upstream. Why? Because they had another boat lined up behind yours to jump onto once they ensured yours sank.
The narcissistic abusive cycle includes these examples and more. It involves a relationship where one person gives everything they can and more, while the other—the narcissist—takes and takes, demanding even more. They disrupt everything they touch throughout their lives. People might say, “You’re being a little dramatic here,” but from my experience, narcissists think differently. Unlike you, they reason differently and lack the ability for introspection. They avoid accountability while seeking to leech off others, crumble their resources like paper, and move on to the next source. I should add that the new source is usually a person.
Remember, the narcissist was running from a previous relationship into your arms. After getting what they wanted from you, they would move on to another person who lacks education, wisdom, or someone already exhibiting toxic traits—sometimes even recycling former relationships, a high school friend, or someone else the narcissist wants to use again. All of these factors contributed to their narcissistic abusive cycle.
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