How a Narcissist Treats Truth Tellers


Nobody is hated more than he who speaks the truth. This is a famous quote I recently came across, and it quite surprisingly reminded me of a narcissist’s incapability to face their reality. For a narcissist, reality is nothing but an aggression, and whoever points out how they are living in an illusion becomes an attacker. What does the narcissist do then? They try to destroy the truth-teller. This is what happened to me in my own family. I was targeted by both of my parents and all their enablers because I chose to speak the truth.

A narcissist’s biggest enemy is a truth-teller—someone who calls things for what they are. If they see a narcissist abusing people, manipulating, gaslighting, belittling, dehumanizing, putting people down, or doing something wrong, they will call them out on their behavior. They may not label it as such, but they will point out the hypocrisy. In other words, they force a narcissist to see their reality, which burns them inside out. Why? Because a narcissist does not want anyone to call them out on their behavior. They want to be enabled, want everyone to agree with them, and want you to fall under their control. Their dominion should be established, and you should be a part of their false ego. You cannot have a separate individual self that sees and feels too much. You are supposed to surrender.

When you, as a truth-teller, do not comply, you really bother them, which is why you become a scapegoat in a narcissistic family cult. That’s what turns you into a black sheep because you are not willing to play the mind game. Your dominant survival response is the fight response, and you fight tooth and nail for justice, which unfortunately often lands you in more trouble, especially in situations where you do not have power.

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