What makes this particularly cruel is that they are simultaneously intrigued by your kindness and disgusted by it. They see your compassion as a weakness—something that repulses them about you—but they love the fact that they can weaponize it. Your empathy becomes ammunition in their hands. This is why they often become more cruel after you have been especially kind to them. It is a strategy. They have identified your kindness as both your weakness and their opportunity. They are not grateful; they are calculating. They know how to exploit what they see as your pathetic need to please them.
Truth number three: Narcissists are haunted by a version of themselves that never got to exist. Perhaps the most devastating truth that awakened empaths perceive is that narcissists are mourning a version of themselves that never had the chance to develop. We call it their real self. Deep down, they know they are not living authentically, but they do not know how to be any other way. You have probably sensed this in moments where they seem almost nostalgic for something they never had. They may mention dreams they gave up or talk about who they wanted to be before life hardened them. As an awakened empath, you can feel their grief for the person they could have been if they had been loved unconditionally as children. This creates a profound sadness because they are simultaneously the victim and the perpetrator of their own story. They are trapped in patterns that protect them from further hurt, but those same patterns prevent them from experiencing the love, healing, and connection they desperately need. It’s such a mess. They know they are hurting people, which creates an additional layer of self-loathing. They hate themselves for being the way they are, but they do not want to change. It’s like being trapped in a prison of their own making, where the very behaviors that once protected them now isolate them further.
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