Today we will be looking at why the narcissist starts caring when you stop. But before I get into it, I need to make it clear that this is only likely to happen if you are a primary source of supply to the narcissist. When it comes to narcissists, they have different categories for the people in their lives, which are based solely on how much narcissistic supply they get from these people. The quality of narcissistic supply is based on what you have, the position you hold, or the opportunities you offer to the narcissist. Those who offer the most narcissistic supply equally have the most power when it comes to not only hurting the narcissist but influencing their behaviors.
So, in a way, I guess this could be a test for those who want to know how much they matter to a narcissist when it comes to narcissistic supply. But let’s get into it. Narcissistic relationships are very unstable, as a lot of it comes down to the mood the narcissist is in. They can demonstrate nothing but hate for you one day and then love you to the end of the world and back the next. Narcissists are not consistent or considerate in their dealings with those they claim to love. This is why people end up walking on eggshells around a narcissist, for the very fact that they can be so moody.
We have already established that loving a narcissist does not work. Being forgiving, accommodating, and continually reacting to their hurtful behaviors is not the way to go. That will only stress you out and feed the narcissist’s ego in the process. But we need to remember that narcissists are needy people. They want your time, love, and attention while they give nothing back in return. So, when you turn off that emotional tap and just stop caring about the narcissist, that gets their attention. You not paying them attention. You not reacting to their provocations. You not trying to please them. You not caring what they are up to. You not giving in to their demands. You not seeking their approval or validation. All these are signals to the narcissist that they are losing control of you.
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