You’ve been told a lie: Empaths do not attract narcissists. Rather, it is the narcissist who desperately seeks out an empath. Why? Because they view the empath as a key—a way to unstick themselves from the emotional purgatory they’ve been trapped in since childhood. Unconsciously, they latch onto the empath, hoping the relationship will fix what’s broken.
But they sabotage it every time because it’s in their nature. On the surface, it’s easy to say, “Oh, the narcissist needs supply, and the empath provides it.” However, the dynamic goes much deeper than that. we’ll uncover three reasons why a narcissist craves an empath so desperately. Overcoming betrayal trauma after narcissistic abuse is incredibly complex. Understanding this dynamic is a step toward healing.
Reason 1: The Empath as the “Ideal Parent”
Narcissists are emotionally stuck in childhood. Somewhere along the way, they became trapped in a developmental stage where they never fully separated from their parent. This is often due to that parent being narcissistic, abusive, or emotionally unavailable.
When they meet an empath—when they meet you—their subconscious sees an opportunity. It whispers, Here is my second chance. Here is my ideal parent.
This is why they often love-bomb you so intensely. They see you as a stand-in for the parent they never had—someone who can provide the unconditional love, care, and safety they’ve been searching for their entire life.
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