When you engage with a narcissist—whether by offering compliments, attention, or even emotional reactions—you fuel their ego. This validation reinforces their sense of power and control. It’s not about genuine connection or mutual respect; it’s about feeding their endless need for external affirmation.
Why Narcissists Come Back
When you start moving on, the narcissist feels an acute loss of control. Here’s why they suddenly come running back:
- Your Energy Is Recharged
After spending time healing and working on yourself, you’ve likely regained emotional strength and stability. To a narcissist, this makes you an attractive source of validation once again. Your renewed energy draws them back, as they believe they can extract more attention and power from you.
- A Sense of Ownership
Narcissists often view their partners or close connections as possessions. They feel entitled to your time, attention, and energy, regardless of how they’ve treated you. When you start to pull away, it threatens their perceived ownership, compelling them to reassert control.
- They Thrive on Emotional Reactions
Whether it’s love, anger, sadness, or frustration, any emotional reaction you give a narcissist feeds their ego. If they can provoke you—whether by being overly affectionate or deliberately causing pain—they regain a sense of power.
- Fear of Losing Supply
Narcissists rely on what’s known as “narcissistic supply”—the attention, admiration, and emotional energy they extract from others. When you move on, they fear losing this supply, so they’ll do whatever it takes to draw you back in.
Continue reading on the next page
Sharing is caring!
