When a narcissist knows you are waking up from the psychological coma they have put you in, you are seeing through them. You are gaining clarity and you are about to expose their true nature. They pull one of the cleverest tricks to stop you in your tracks: they ask a very invalidating question that instantly freezes you. The question is: “Just give me an example of when I did that. Give me an example of when I abandoned you. Give me an example of when I gaslit you. Give me an example of when I manipulated you. Give me an example of when I abused you.”
Especially if it is a covert narcissist that you’re dealing with, who never raises their voice, never verbally abuses you, and has never put their hands on you. What example will you give them? You know it as a pattern; it has happened over and over again. You have so many memories and experiences that you can’t just come up with one instantly. They create pressure; they don’t let you think, they don’t let you breathe. Because of your trauma, your brain is not able to process so much information at once, and it goes blank.
Then, they pull another trick: “See, this is what I’m talking about. You have no example, you have no proof of what I am doing or what you think I am doing.” They counter-gaslight you further. For example, you tell them, “You abandon me or you neglect me,” and then they ask you for an example. Now, you can’t give them an example. It’s a felt sense; it’s an experience.
What are the 4 weird eye movements of a narcissist?
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