Another example that perfectly illustrates this is a narcissist whose only supply was their sister. Everything in this narcissist’s life was copied, stolen, and taken from their sister because she was a great source of supply. The sister was literally their lifeline, their source of identity, achievements, and even personality traits. When the sister finally left, the narcissist literally started unraveling before my eyes and began falling apart because their entire existence had been built on mimicking someone else. Their life lost all its color when the sister went away, and for the first time, they faced the consequences of their parasitic behavior, which they could not tolerate at all. They collapsed and became majorly depressed because they suddenly realized they had no authentic self to fall back on.
The reason this hits them so hard is that they have never developed a genuine sense of self. They have a false self. Their entire identity has been built around controlling and manipulating others. When those people are no longer available to abuse, when the supply is cut off, they’re forced to confront the emptiness within themselves. They realize that all their wealth, all their achievements, all their perceived power means nothing without someone to dominate and control. This is when you see the true fragility beneath their grandiose facade. They become desperate, reaching out through flying monkeys, trying manipulation tactics that previously worked, and making promises they have no intention of keeping.
But once someone has truly awakened to their nature and walked away, there is no going back. The narcissist is left to face something they have spent their entire life avoiding. The most profound consequence is not external punishment or public humiliation. It is the internal collapse that happens when they can no longer escape the reality of who they are and what they have done. They have created a prison of their own making. And for the first time, they are the only one inside it, and you cannot go in to rescue them because you played no part in it. The only option you have is to let them face it. You can’t do anything about it, and you have power over your healing. So take it back.
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