If I ask you where you stand on the list of a narcissist’s priorities, you may answer, “Nowhere, because I’m not a priority, and they don’t love me.” You are right, but what if I told you they do place you somewhere in their hierarchy? It’s a hierarchy they create, filled with all the things they claim to love. While you may not be a priority in the way you expect, you do have a place because you are a source of supply to them. To explain where you fit in, let’s talk about the entire hierarchy, which I call a narcissist’s pyramid of affection. They place everything they love in this pyramid, as long as it provides them with supply. Let me explain each tier and level to you, one by one, by breaking down the order of the things a narcissist loves.
Top of the Pyramid: Narcissistic Family
At the top of the pyramid, or hierarchy, a narcissist places their mother or sister—the narcissistic family. For a male narcissist, there is often a deep enmeshment with his family. The umbilical cord has not been cut, and he returns to them again and again for supply. While you are replaceable, they are not. A narcissist will choose their family over you a thousand times and more. A narcissistic man is often emotionally “married” to his mother, which is why you are her biggest enemy. She wants to be involved in your relationship and will interfere incessantly. The narcissistic family does not let go of their cult member, and their bond is strong, making them the top priority for that narcissist.
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