To regain your power, instead of defending against the word, you have to lean into it, like an Aikido master redirects an attack. You don’t resist the force; you join it, let it pass through, and turn it back on itself. The attack loses its power because you’re no longer standing in opposition. You’ve stepped out of the game. Instead of defending against the word, you lean into it; you own it and redirect the strength.
This means you have to stop being afraid of that label and begin to see it as a tool for empowerment. This doesn’t mean pretending to be fine with it; it means finding the small truth in what they said and standing in it. If they call you selfish, you say, “Yeah, I can be selfish.” If they call you cruel, you say, “I can see how you might think that.” If they call you crazy, you might even agree.
The formula is simple: agree with the label without apology or defense. They are counting on your fear—your need to prove that you’re not sensitive, not crazy, or not selfish. When you stop defending your image, they lose their leverage. The power move here is understanding the tactic; it feeds on rigidity. The more tightly you cling to who you think you have to be, the easier you are to destabilize.
Like in Aikido, power isn’t about resistance; it’s about redirection. The more flexible you are, the more power you have. The more you can say, “Yes, that might be true about me,” and mean it, the less leverage anyone has in any kind of attempt like this.
When the first phase doesn’t work, the SCOP escalates. Now they’ll try to control how others see you. On a global scale, politically or in the media, this looks like narrative manipulation or propaganda—shaping public perception to make someone look unstable or dangerous so that everybody backs away. On a personal scale, it’s the same tactic, and it’s called a smear campaign.
The manipulator gets out in front of the story, framing events, conversations, or conflicts in a way that protects their image and discredits you before you’ve even spoken. It’s not about what’s true; it’s about who controls the story first. This works because most people don’t want to challenge what looks like the majority view. When it seems like everyone believes something, they’ll go along, not necessarily because they agree, but because they don’t want to stand alone.
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