They have created this mini cult
They have created this mini cult where they are the leader and every single friend is actually a member who does not have a working brain of theirs. They just simply copy what the leader says and spread it out. These members are also used to abuse you thoroughly. They justify the narcissist’s actions like no one else. They would rather die than accept that the narcissist they’re following, they’re worshiping is wrong. If these are the relational dynamics between your narcissistic parent or partner and their so-called friends, how can we call it a friendship? For friendship is about authenticity, responsibility, accountability, transparency, communication, mutual respect, equality. I’m asking you, do you find any of those in their relationship? You may say, “Oh yeah, he or she is nice to them.” But what is this nice demeanor all about? They are putting up a front. It’s a mask they’re wearing, which is anti-authenticity. You are their partner, you are their child; they couldn’t be authentic with you. How can they be authentic with somebody else?
What is a real friendship?
A real friendship, in my opinion, is beyond money; it’s beyond what I can get from you and what you can give me. Yes, that is the kind of help you get from your friend, they are there for you, for sure, it comes with that. It’s a byproduct of your relationship with your friend, but it’s not something that you maintain this relationship for. If that is what this friendship is all about, then it’s not a friendship to begin with; it’s something else entirely, a different relationship based on your selfish interest but not of friendship. You do not know each other, you do not respect each other, there is a hierarchy established where the narcissist is on the top or in competition with those who are like him or her, and then there are people way below them. How is it a friendship? That’s why I defined it as a cult.
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