Not all of these methods are accessible to everyone, and they may evolve throughout a relationship. Let’s view this as a continuum. At one extreme, we have no contact, essentially an “I am dead to you” approach—blocking and eradicating all communication. It’s a significant step. Preliminary research suggests that no contact often leads to improved mental and physical health over time, as it removes a toxic stressor from your life.
However, no contact isn’t feasible for everyone. If you are co-parenting minor children, it may not be possible. You might want to go no contact with one family member but still maintain ties with others you care about. If you are still working with a narcissistic boss or colleague, it’s also challenging.
In cases like breakups where there are no ongoing ties, no contact can be effective. Some people feel guilty about going no contact, which often stems from a trauma bond—feeling responsible for the abuser’s hurt. But after overcoming that initial hurdle, it often gets better.
Sometimes, no contact may be broken due to illness or death, and that’s okay. You can maintain minimal contact during a crisis and revert to no contact afterward. People can evolve into no contact after years of navigating complex family dynamics or after leaving a job.
Going from regular contact to no contact can be difficult. For some, low contact is the only option left. Low contact involves minimal essential communication, focusing solely on necessary matters. It can be effective in workplaces and with narcissistic family members.
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