Another thing that narcissists often say is, “Good luck replacing me.” They might say, “Good luck finding someone else to put up with you,” or “Good luck finding someone else who makes as much money as I do,” or “Someone who’s as attractive as I am.” When they say things like that, they’re trying to imply that you don’t actually deserve them and that they’re lowering themselves to be with you. But if you’ve ever heard this, I hope your response was, “Thank goodness! Thank goodness I will not find another you.” The narcissist does not see that they have the flaws that they actually do. They don’t see that they’re emotionally abusive and that they’re destroying your sense of self-worth and self-esteem. They don’t see or take responsibility for the impact of their actions; they only see the grandiose version of themselves. So why wouldn’t you be happy to be with them?
When they say something like “Good luck replacing me,” an appropriate response is, “Thank goodness! If I never find anyone like you ever again, my life will be good.”
Another thing that you’re likely to hear from a narcissist in an argument, or even whenever you’re pointing out something that they need to change, is, “Oh, here we go again.” They can’t be bothered. You’re bringing up the same things again and again because there are problems that an emotionally healthy person would recognize and work on. But the narcissist does not recognize them and does not work on them. You end up repeating yourself and beating your head against the wall trying to get this person to see what is so clear and plain, but they won’t. They can’t do it.
Whenever you bring up the same thing again, the problem isn’t really that you’re bringing it up again; the problem is that the same thing is happening again, but they don’t see it. They don’t take responsibility for it, so they’re going to try to turn it around on you and say, “Oh, here you go again bringing up this old stuff.” They might say something like, “I thought we resolved this already,” which makes you wonder. You’re thinking, “Well, yeah, I did, but then you’re doing the same thing again, and I’m confused.” Again, they’re turning it back around on you so they don’t have to take responsibility for their bad behavior. If you’re questioning yourself, they have you under control.
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