Hoovering is a tactic used by many narcissists to attempt to get back with their partner. They use different techniques such as reminiscing about old times, faking health scares, or showing up unannounced to surprise the victim. These techniques can work on the right victim and lure them back into the trap.
The bigger question to ask here is, “Why does the narcissist feel the need to lure the victim back instead of just finding a new one?” Well, that is a great question. The most common age range for narcissism is between 19 and 40 years old. This age range is very self-centered and usually the one at which the most hoovering takes place.
That being said, hoovering can happen for many other reasons, but usually not because they simply miss their partner. So if your ex is hoovering you or you know someone who is, please watch this video for some sad reasons that a person might hoover someone else. You may be surprised by what you learn!
Number 1: Pride.
“Sorry, I just think it’s best for both of us if I stay away from you from now on.” Ouch! That can really hurt someone’s pride. Pride is a big reason why the narcissist is hoovering you after no contact. If you completely cut ties with them after giving them the breakup speech, their pride will be hurt more than anything else. Their attempt to get you back is more for their sake than yours. Their feelings have been hurt, and they will not allow that. They see you as having the upper hand in the situation, and that is also not allowed. They see getting you back as a goal and a way to boost their self-esteem. While most people would try to boost their self-esteem by doing things they enjoy, such as working out, buying a new wardrobe, or getting into a new hobby, narcissists will hoover to ease their hurt pride. They want to prove to you and themselves that they can get you to speak to them after no contact. It’s more of a game to them. Pride can ruin almost any relationship. It is one of the many reasons for the victim running from the relationship.
Number 2: Rejection.
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