This is my life story. My father would occasionally spend some money on my health, but whenever he would, he would really make bad faces and make you feel you are a burden. It really irks them when they have to make things happen and move things unconditionally. There always has to be a transaction happening. It is never unconditional. If they are giving you something, you have to give something back in return. I once asked my father, “Don’t you feel bad about spending all this money on my education?” because I always felt I was undeserving of that money. Why? All because of his treatment. Listen to this. He said, “Don’t you worry about that. It’s an investment. It’s like you’re giving somebody a loan. Tomorrow you’re going to get it back, and that too with interest.” And there was a smirk, a smile on his face. I still to this day remember the confusion because back then I couldn’t understand what he meant and why, why would he say something like that?
But today I understand the reason. The reason was he saw it as an investment. He was not doing it because he was supposed to; he was doing it because it was an investment, and he would get all of it back, plus the money he could extract from me. The proof of which lies in the curse. He cursed me in my last fight with him, saying, “May you remain alive, but always live like a beggar.” And he cursed the money that he had spent on me. With my mother, she would count all the things she had done for me. If I were to go against her words, or do something that would expose her, or if I were to try to hold her accountable or ask, “Why did you say or do that?” to guilt-trip me and instantly get control back, she would pull out a list and read the items like, “I bought you this, I did that,” and it would go on and on forever.
When they see someone more accomplished than them.
What to do when a narcissist turns people against you
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