They play the game of semantics. For example, you might say, “You were disloyal to me.” They’ll respond, “I’m not disloyal. See, I’m sitting here right now talking about this issue. How can you call me disloyal?” Then, the conversation shifts to whether you used the right word. You try to clarify: “I didn’t mean you’re disloyal in everything, but in this relationship, you cheated on me.” They’ll say, “Now you’re generalizing,” making it about word choice instead of the issue at hand.
This tactic buys them time, distracts you, and drains your energy. They go around in circles until you’re so exhausted that you say, “Forget this conversation!” That’s when they turn it on you, claiming, “See, you can’t even communicate properly. That’s why nothing gets resolved.”
Mind Game Number Four: Whitewashing Their Image
They focus on all the good things they’ve done. “I bought you that expensive ring. If I didn’t love you, I wouldn’t have given you that.” “Remember our vacation? We had such a great time!” By bringing up positive memories, they guilt-trip you into ignoring their bad behavior. You start to think, “Maybe I’m the problem. Maybe I’m too sensitive.”
But those “minor mistakes” they want you to overlook might be serious, like not speaking to you for three weeks. They whitewash their actions and suppress your emotions until you explode. That’s when they point out, “Look at how you’re reacting. You’re always so dramatic, and I’m the calm one.”
Mind Game Number Five: Aggression
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