4. Puppy patting.
This is something I personally experienced. When narcissists hug you, it feels like you’re hugging a tree or a big rock—they’re really rigid, not even breathing because they don’t want to feel vulnerable. They’re closed off. But some of them will hug you and pat you on the back in a way that feels like they are patting a puppy. They’ll tilt their body away from you while patting, signifying they don’t want to feel your touch or that they want you to go away. You never feel an emotional connection with them because of this kind of behavior. Again, a small disclaimer: in some cultures, patting during a hug is normal. People do it out of love; it’s part of their culture. That’s why I said context matters. Some older people do it as well. You may do it too, but ask yourself—was your intention to get rid of the person you were patting? No, it wasn’t. So, this behavior, in isolation, means nothing. Just because you pat while hugging doesn’t make you a narcissist. It simply means that you are different and that you show a similar behavior, but in a different context, with a different meaning.
5. Counter questioning.
Narcissists use this tactic a lot to avoid taking responsibility. That’s why you can’t have a conversation with them. Let’s say you ask them a question; they will counter-question you. If you say, “Where were you? I called you multiple times. I was really worried,” they might respond, “Where were you when I needed you?” or “Where were you when I called you last time?” They may even change the subject, bringing up something unrelated just to avoid answering the question. It is a really annoying behavior. When you say, “I’m not asking you about what I did. I’m asking you where you were,” they’ll respond with, “You are always blaming me. It’s always about me. What about you? What did you do the last time?” You see, they always go back to what you did wrong. They always point the finger at you.
5 Stupid Habits Narcissists Believe Make Them Look Smart
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