Number 5: Let them know what behavior is acceptable.
While you may never have a totally normal relationship with a narcissistic brother or sister, that doesn’t mean you can’t try to set up some ground rules on how they can and can’t treat you. Letting them know when they’ve crossed a line is helpful for many families, as is being direct and honest on how you feel about their words or actions. Ultimately, you are trying to rope them into only acting in a way that is acceptable to you, even if that may never really be possible. This is usually a big step for people, and there is no way to know how the narcissist will react the first time you try this out. Some will try to be cool about it, especially if you have the support of other family members, while others may try to fight against being held accountable.
Number 4: Focus on your own actions and responsibilities.
You’ll never be able to control anything more than your own self. While we may collaborate often with other people, that requires a sense of trust and understanding that narcissists are not willing to reach. As a result, worrying about anything outside of your immediate control when it involves a narcissist is just asking for trouble – you’re bound to wind up with a strong feeling of disappointment if you are going to wait for a narcissist to respect your boundaries. All you can do is focus on your own actions, and make sure that you are doing well in your own eyes.
Number 3: Find a shared interest to talk about when you see them.
You may not have control over everything, but you definitely can prepare accordingly. When you know you are going to see a narcissist, try to have a few things to talk about that they may like. If you are able to achieve a positive mood then you have a better chance at deflecting their questions and comments. It’s even better if you both enjoy the thing you are talking about, but even getting them talking about a hobby or special interest for a while can allow you to keep them at bay and give you time to set up more questions.
7 Ways To Get A Narcissist To Respect You
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