Every form of narcissistic abuse is, in fact, physical abuse. It does not matter if they never screamed, yelled, or laid a hand on you; psychologically, they have physically violated you by invading your personal space and suffocating you in what is meant to be your refuge—your home. That’s why it’s not just in your head; this is why you do not feel safe in your own room and are always waiting for that other shoe to drop.
Number one: They take over shared spaces.
Words like justice, equality, cooperation, and respect do not exist in a narcissist’s dictionary. They are territorial by nature. When you share any space with them—be it your household, office, or any communal area—they come in like a strong, destructive force. They see an opportunity and take over, dictating how that space will be used and setting rules non-consensually.
For example, you may let your narcissistic partner move into your apartment because they need a roof over their head. Instead of being grateful, they will almost instantly demand their own private space, asking, “Where’s my room?” You show them your room and explain that it is our shared space, but the word “our” will be omitted. They will throw out your belongings from your closet without asking and start placing their items there. They won’t ask you what to do with their shoes or luggage; instead, they will reshape the environment and justify it by claiming it’s a better or more minimalistic way to manage things. They do not create space for you or ask if they can remove your items; they conquer it.
What does this do to you? It makes you feel like you are intruding in your own home, alienating you and leaving you speechless.
Number two: They rearrange things without consent.
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