Moving on to number nine: fear of taking ownership. Many victims shy away from cleaning up after experiencing narcissistic abuse because it feels like a huge responsibility. Cleaning means you’re taking ownership of your space, and that can be intimidating when you’ve been in a situation where your feelings and boundaries were constantly undermined. As Dr. Judith Orloff, a psychiatrist, says, “Healing from emotional trauma requires reclaiming your space and your sense of self.” So it’s not just about dust and clutter; it’s about stepping back into your power, which can be a big deal.
Social Comparison
Finally, we’re down to number ten: social comparison. It’s pretty common for people who’ve gone through narcissistic abuse to avoid cleaning because they can’t help but compare themselves to others. When you look at someone else’s perfectly tidy home, it can make you feel like you’re falling short. As life coach Marie Forleo puts it, “Comparison is the thief of joy.” So instead of feeling motivated to clean, you might end up feeling overwhelmed and inadequate. This comparison trap can keep you stuck, making it even harder to take that first step toward tidying up your space and reclaiming your sense of home. To overcome this, focus on your progress and set personal goals that celebrate small achievements rather than measuring yourself against others.
To wrap things up, it’s easy to see why victims of narcissistic abuse might steer clear of cleaning and tidying up. The emotional toll can make even simple tasks feel overwhelming. When your mind is filled with anxiety, self-doubt, or the fear of criticism, it’s no surprise that cleaning gets pushed aside. But here’s a little encouragement: recognizing this struggle is the first step toward healing. It’s okay to take things slow and focus on small wins. Remember, creating a space that feels safe and calm can really help your mental health. Little by little, you can find your way back to a more organized life at your own pace.
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