Today, I will be examining something that all narcissists will do when a relationship ends and how they actually planned for it in the early stages of the relationship. This is regardless of whether you discarded them or they discarded you. As I always say, it doesn’t matter who the narcissist is—whether it is a parent, sibling, friend, partner, or boss—they all behave the same.
I think we can agree that a relationship with a narcissist is a broken one and, most definitely, a toxic one. Some people can navigate their way around the toxicity to make it somewhat workable, but many cannot. So, those relationships usually end. Ending a relationship is never easy, especially after spending years or even decades with that person. It can be even more jarring when it’s a family member. However, letting go is sometimes the only way to move forward, and this is especially true when dealing with narcissists. There is power in walking away; there is newfound strength when we are finally able to turn our backs on those people who have been hurting us or just breaking us down. Narcissists, of course, have a way of trying to make people dependent on them or even just think that they need them, so they can stay in their lives. But this is just manipulation, and it’s important that anyone in that position sees it for what it is.
A relationship can end for many reasons, but when it’s a normal relationship, both parties are usually willing to own up to and be accountable for the role they played in the relationship coming to an end. This is where relationships with narcissists are different, because when a relationship ends with a narcissist, they are never at fault. So, what will all narcissists do when a relationship ends? They will blame the other person for the relationship falling apart. Even if they try to appear reasonable and accept a small percentage, the onus will be on the other person. This is always the case, whether the narcissist discarded you or you discarded them. The other person is to blame but never the narcissist. The other person made things unbearable, and that is why the narcissist had to discard them. Or the other person was crazy and selfish, and that is why they discarded the narcissist. The narrative is always the same; for some strange reason, the narcissist is the one who keeps ending up with partners or people who are not right or mentally unstable. The narcissist is the good guy or the helpless victim who can’t find someone to love them the way they deserve. If you meet someone like this who blames all their exes for the relationship ending, that is a big red flag.
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