When survivors try to express their feelings, they’re often dismissed as being “too sensitive” or accused of “holding onto the past.” Narcissists expect them to move on quickly, pretend everything is fine, and maintain a façade of happiness. This pretense serves the narcissist’s ego, reinforcing their belief that the relationship is intact.
However, when survivors go silent, it signifies a complete rejection of the narcissist’s control. They no longer show emotions—positive or negative—because they know any reaction will be weaponized against them.
Some survivors worry that giving the narcissist the silent treatment makes them no better than their abuser. But it’s important to understand the difference: a narcissist’s silence is punitive, whereas a survivor’s silence is protective.
Narcissist’s Reaction to Your Silence
When you go silent, narcissists often react explosively. They throw tantrums, try to lure you back, and, if that fails, they lash out. Their rage exposes their true nature. They may attack your past, your future, or anything they know will hurt you deeply—all to provoke a reaction.
For narcissists, your silence is intolerable because it robs them of control. It forces them to confront their own emptiness. By staying silent, you allow them to reveal their true selves.
Conclusion
Silence is the ultimate power move against a narcissist. It signals that you are no longer willing to participate in their games. When you refuse to engage, you deny them the fuel they crave.
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