Let’s move on to number three: the Brat or Spoiled Attitude. I once heard a colleague say, “What Chris wants, Chris gets.” That’s how some narcissists talk about themselves, with an attitude of entitlement that everything should bend to their will. This behavior stems from growing up in environments where their wants were prioritized over others, creating the belief that they’re above needing to compromise or consider anyone else’s feelings. It’s like they’ve never outgrown the “I’m the center of the universe” phase, and as a result, they expect people to serve them without question. Dr. Craig Malin, a psychologist and author of Rethinking Narcissism, explains that narcissists often develop this inflated sense of entitlement because their emotional needs were either overindulged or ignored, leaving them with unrealistic expectations of how the world should cater to them.
Now let’s continue to number four: the Passive-Aggressive Victim Role. Have you heard narcissists sound like they’re talking about someone else’s pain, but it’s actually theirs? That’s the narcissist slipping into the passive-aggressive victim role. Instead of saying, “I feel hurt,” they’ll say, “People always expect so much from her,” as if they’re not her. It’s their way of fishing for pity without owning their feelings directly. According to therapist Eliana Pac, author of The Wizard of Oz and Other Narcissists, this kind of communication lets them appear vulnerable while sidestepping accountability. It also creates confusion because you’re not sure whether to comfort them or call out the weird detachment.
You shouldn’t miss number five: the Idol Worship of Themselves. Instead of just saying, “I’m good at what I do,” they’ll say, “When John puts his mind to something, there’s no stopping him,” as if John isn’t standing right there talking about himself. It’s weird, but it’s on purpose. Narcissists use this trick to create distance while hyping themselves up like some mythical figure. Clinical psychologist Dr. Craig Malin explains that narcissists often engage in emotional airbrushing to paint themselves as flawless and larger than life. By talking this way, they give off a “legend in the making” vibe, as if they’re not just a person but a brand. And let’s be honest, when someone starts talking about themselves like they’re the chosen one, it’s not confidence; it’s a red flag wrapped in ego. Ever sat through one of those monologues where you weren’t sure whether to clap or just back away slowly?
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