Abandonment is a very primal experience; it’s not an adult “goodbye, see you later,” where you feel confident you’ll see them again. It’s the terror a baby feels when their caregiver leaves the room, unable to understand that the caregiver is separate from them. A narcissistic person, though an adult, may still experience separation as a cataclysm.
People with antagonistic personalities are often highly sensitive to rejection, a trait known as rejection sensitivity. For them, any form of rejection is emotionally unsettling, and they may become hyper-reactive even to small slights, like someone declining an invitation. This rejection sensitivity can explain their excessive reactivity to criticism or perceived slights. Despite this fragility, a person with a narcissistic personality will often deny their vulnerability, preferring to project strength. They may rage against you, the one who activated these uncomfortable feelings, because they don’t understand them and don’t want to understand them. You may be surprised to see them become so fragile in the face of an upcoming or even perceived separation, despite their usual dominance.
Fears about abandonment and strong reactions to it are often associated with borderline personality styles, but they also apply to narcissistic personalities, which share some origins with borderline personalities. The abandonment crises of a narcissistic personality make sense in light of attachment theories, even if we don’t expect it because we don’t see the same levels of despair and instability typically associated with borderline personalities.
Proof a Narcissist’s Nature is Evil
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