When you’re entrenched in a relationship with a narcissist, the desire to outsmart them is strong. The pain and betrayal from someone you trusted and loved deeply can make you feel desperate to win or gain the upper hand. But here’s the hard truth: I’ve never seen anyone successfully outsmart a narcissist in the way they hope to, and here’s why.
Why Outsmarting a Narcissist Rarely Works
A narcissist operates without boundaries or conscience, fueled by an inflated ego. If you enter a battle with them from a place of logic or defense, you’re fighting someone armed with far more destructive tools. A narcissist would rather self-destruct and take you down with them than lose control.
The narcissist’s ego cannot tolerate defeat. Their greatest fear is annihilation, so they will stop at nothing to maintain power over you. They expertly target your deepest insecurities—your fears, need for love, approval, and safety. They know how to push those buttons to keep you powerless.
If you attempt to beat them at their own game, you’re entering a toxic ego battle. For you to succeed, you’d have to adopt the same ruthless, boundary-less behaviors as the narcissist. In doing so, you’d lose your own true self in the process.
The Soul-Level Truth of Narcissistic Abuse
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