4. Demanding Urgent Texts
So maybe they haven’t texted you in four or six hours, and then suddenly you get texts from them saying, “Call me now, I need to talk to you.” “What are you doing?” “Why aren’t you answering?” And then they start calling you multiple times. When you get back to them, they’re totally offended that you made them wait, often demanding to know what was more important than them. And yet whatever they had to say wasn’t even urgent. And they simply don’t care about any valid reasons you may have had for not answering them immediately.
But on the other hand, like I said, the narcissist feels entitled to leave you hanging. In fact, they love to do this. And if you have codependent traits or shame-based programming, you’ll likely start to wonder what you did wrong, what’s wrong with you, why they’re mad at you, and fearing abandonment. So you might start texting them, and they’ll ignore you even longer, feeling calmer knowing that you’re getting more upset and anxious.
5. Random heartfelt conversations
So let’s say you’ve been ghosted for a few days without explanation. They went silent on you. But then suddenly they come out of the woodwork again, initiating a heartfelt conversation by text. Maybe they start out by telling you how crazy busy they’ve been or maybe they were really depressed or they got scared when they realized how hard they’re falling for you. They may talk about their fears of abandonment, forging emotional intimacy. Once you accept their excuses, the text will go back to being very similar to what you receive during the love bombing phase, things like, “You’re my entire world.” “I can’t live without you.” “I want to marry you, have children with you.” And fill in the blank with whatever your deepest needs and desires are.
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