If you spend hours lying in bed reliving past arguments, second-guessing your choices, or bracing for imaginary conflicts, it’s not insomnia; it’s your nervous system stuck in survival mode. Narcissistic abuse conditions you to expect emotional ambushes even in moments that should be peaceful.
Dr. Peter Levine, a trauma expert and author of Waking the Tiger, explains that trauma isn’t just in the past; it lingers in the body, keeping you trapped in a cycle of hyper-awareness. That’s why your brain won’t rest; it’s been trained to anticipate danger even when none is present. Your body doesn’t just forget years of manipulation overnight. When someone constantly gaslights you, shifts blame, or makes you doubt your reality, your mind stays wired to defend itself even when there’s no longer a battle to fight.
Dr. Caroline Leaf, a cognitive neuroscientist, states that thought patterns shaped by trauma can keep the brain in a loop of stress, making it hard to turn off at night. This is why falling asleep feels like an impossible task; your brain is still trying to untangle years of confusion. The first step to healing is realizing that you don’t need to keep replaying the past to protect yourself. Peace isn’t something you have to earn; it’s something you are allowed to claim.
3. You frequently wake up at dawn after a nightmare.
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