Just simple and plain. On the flip side, some survivors go for an ultra-natural look, barely using anything at all. Why? It’s a trauma response. When you looked too good in that relationship, what happened? You were punished by the narcissist. They accused you of trying to impress someone else, which made you feel ashamed of yourself for wearing lipstick or even sabotaging your beauty products. So now that you have broken free, you are subconsciously trying to avoid attention. It’s a survival tactic, but one that keeps you small. This is why so many survivors struggle with dressing up again because, in your mind, looking good equals danger.
Number four: many survivors use dark and smudgy eyeliners.
This one is often unintentional. As a survivor, you may not mean to wear heavy, dark eyeliner that looks slightly messy or smudged, but it’s a reflection of what’s going on inside. What am I talking about? Complex trauma, grief, and exhaustion manifest physically. The dark eyeliner and heavy smudging often mirror the emotional weight you carry, but invisibly. It’s almost as if your pain is leaking into your makeup choices without you even realizing it. You’re tired, your soul is heavy, and your eyes show it.
Number five: foundation overload. Why?
To mask past pain. Many survivors apply a lot of foundation. It’s almost like they’re trying to cover up something more than just blemishes. During the relationship, you were constantly nitpicked and criticized. The narcissist pointed out your flaws and made you feel ugly and unworthy. So now this foundation becomes more than just makeup; it’s a mask, a way to erase imperfections and hide the emotional scars of the past. It’s about creating a clean slate, but deep down, it also reflects the need to feel safe behind a layer of protection.
Number six: you may not use any lipstick at all.
It’s like you’re trying to silence yourself, especially when it comes to bold colors. Why? Because the narcissist forced you to swallow your tongue. They made you second-guess yourself. Every time you spoke up, they shut you down, made fun of you, or manipulated you into thinking your voice didn’t matter. Now, even after leaving, this habit lingers. Skipping lipstick or choosing muted shades is often a subconscious way of staying quiet. Do you see how it all plays out? But it’s time to break the pattern. Wear the red lipstick; it looks good on you. Speak your truth and take that space unapologetically.
Number seven: you may have overdrawn lips.
10 Weird Habits of People Who Have Lived With a Narcissist
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